Showing Gratitude
by FallenMagic
Summary: What Buffy was thinking when she went to meet Spike as the Buffybot


**Showing Gratitude**

I don't know why I am doing this. I just feel as if I have to know what Spike said to Glory. If he gave us away. If all his love for me is an act. As I enter his crypt I see his still form lying on top of the coffin. I can't see his face but can sense his pain. I put on that fake bright smile and strut up to him. I look down upon him and have to keep from gasping. His face was swollen and his eyes were practically swollen shut. And blood lined every feature. But I remind myself why I am here. "Spike!" I say brightly. "You're covered in sexy wounds!" I try not to gag at thought. His wounds are in no way sexy. Horrific yes, sexy no.

"Yeah." Spike says as he tries to sit up, wincing slightly. "I feel real sexy. Where have you been?" he asks. He seems tired, and in pain.

I say the first thing that comes to mind. I didn't really plan this. "I fell down and got confused. Willow fixed me." I hadn't meat to say that part. I quickly cover up. "She's gay."

Spike looks at me curiously. "Will fixed you? I though they'd melt you into scrap."

Oh! Now what do I say? "They were confused too." I quickly try to change the topic. "Do you wanna ravage me now?" Please say no. Please say no.

Spike says weakly, "Give us a minute. Got some bones need mending." I know he is in pain. I can't hold back much longer. 

Curiosity gets the better of me so I ask him. I put on an innocent face and ask him what has plagued me since I found out about his capture. "Why did you let that Glory hurt you?"

"She wanted to know who the key is." Spike informs me. My breath is caught. I need to know whether he told her so I quickly take a stride towards the door saying "Oh, well, I can tell her, and then you'll-"

"No!" Spike's voice is weak and yet I'm surprised by his firmness. He coughs as he tried to continue. "You can't ever. Glory never finds out."

My heart skips a beat. I didn't expect this. I had fully expected him to give us away but the resolve in his face moves me. But I try to keep the robotic action in check as I ask him. "Why?"

Spike goes quiet before softly continuing. "'Cause Buffy ... the other, not so pleasant Buffy," I'm surprisingly slightly offended by that. " ... Anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her. I couldn't live, her bein' in that much pain. Let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did."

I'm speechless as I hear Spike say this. That was so…nice of him to do. Not even nice but incredibly brave. I want to repay him in some way for what he did for Dawn and me. I know just how. I feel somehow compelled to do so, as if I have no control over my body. I frown slightly as I contemplate this. All signs of the robotic motion gone as I lean forward and kiss him lightly on the lips. I cannot believe I am doing this but something makes it seem all right to do so. Spike begins to kiss me back but then suddenly pulls away. He gives me a thoroughly confused look. He knows. I can't tear my eyes away from his face. He is amazed. Even I shocked myself. I didn't expect to enjoy that kiss. I did.

I pull myself away from his gaze and turn to leave. I have to get out of there. I think I gave him my thanks. But his voice stops me. "And my robot?" he asks. But his voice does not sound very concerned. I turn around a bit annoyed. We need to get things clear about that disgusting thing. "The robot is gone. The robot was gross and obscene."

Spike lowers his head, almost as if ashamed. He surprises me yet again. "It wasn't supposed to-"

I can't bear to hear anymore so I cut him off. "Don't. That…thing…it wasn't even real." I turn and start to move back towards the door. But Xander's words keep ringing through my head. He has taken a bad beating for Dawn and me. He could have died. But he chose not to give us away. I can almost hear his head dropping down. I need to say something to know I do appreciate what he did. I pause and say over my shoulder. "What you did, for me, and Dawn… that was real." I see Spike look at me with a slight glimmer of hope as I look at him over my shoulder. "I won't forget it." I then walk out the door into the sunshine. I know I won't forget what he did. I might not show my gratitude but I do appreciate it. I know now I can trust him.

THE END


End file.
